Sometimes life gets tough. As a christian I am not under the impression that life is somehow supposed to be a walk in the park just because we have chosen to engage with the great architect of the universe and the salvation of humanity. Nor do I conclude that He is somehow deficient when things don’t work out the way I hope.
Life is an adventure, and adventures take all sorts of twists and turns, weathering all sorts of conditions and terrains.
Any adventurer worth his weight would admit somedays are bleak, some days are miserable and somedays are a cause for celebration. So lets be honest, most of us find at times life feels like a struggle and other days it feels like magic. Thats life and the nature of its adventure!
A month ago our phone rang and the estate agent we rent with told us the news that our landlords wanted their house back and issued us with a months notice. It was completely unexpected, we had been considering looking for somewhere with more space but we always thought we would be the one in control of the timescale and the ones giving notice. As we began to seriously search the local rental market it was very quickly clear there was very few properties on the market that would be suitable for a family of five including young children.
The desire to provide for your family is a strong instinct and I found myself on a roller coaster of emotions with hope, joy and peace often overshadowed by frustration, disappointment and worry. I wrestled with all of the above as we journeyed the uncertainty of where we would call home and the choices that we have made that significantly affect those possibilities.
We have always made all of our life choices fully aware of the risks and we never would try and hide the fact that we fully knew what we were getting ourselves into when we chose the adventure of mission. When we left Manchester for the North Coast in Northern Ireland we knew there was not a salary waiting for us and we would need to self finance our vision until we were able to grow a support base for Pais in Ireland. We knew that it would be a pinch when we chose to focus first on establishing a strong working model of schools ministry before focusing on raising finance. We are not victims of a difficult economy or poor hard done by church staff, we made all of the choices we have made, eyes wide open, to achieve the dream in our hearts, to provide every young person with the opportunity to respond to God’s incredible and enlivening love. We knew that these choices would have a direct impact on the lifestyle we would be able to lead and the housing we would be able to afford and we made them anyway. Sometimes you just have to choose which of your dreams you value more.
We have been incredibly blessed with wonderful people in our lives who as soon as we made it public we were looking for a new house to rent joined in our search and began emailing, texting and face-booking links, numbers and suggestions. Truly we appreciated the effort everyone of those people made and the care they showed for our family. The first house we went to see was in many ways just what we had been hoping for, it was a large house with a large garden perfect for our kids, lots of space everywhere. (and it had stairs, top of our oldest son’s request list after living in a bungalow for the last 4 years) However it was significantly out of our price range so we continued our search.
We prayed and we picked up the phone, we walked into estate agents and chatted with any landlords we knew or thought might have spare houses. We completely believe in the power of prayer, but we also believe God gave us a brain for a reason and so we prayed and pushed every door we could leaving no stone unturned, trusting that God would guide our path. Everyday we trawled the property sites to see if anything new had come up and followed up links and phone numbers that people were sending us with suggestions. We went to see a few houses and unfortunately nothing quite matched the house we currently lived in or came close to the first house we saw.
The search took some interesting twists and turns and for 3 weeks we explored every option that came our way but nothing fitted our needs or budget. When we had virtually exhausted all options one unexpected twist took us down a road which looked like the possibility to buy a house might open up. We even went to view one which as far as we could tell would have been perfect and fell in love with the idea of owning our home. However what looked hopeful quickly turned into a dead end as financial advisers and banks politely and not so politely declined to offer us a mortgage.
As we hit the end of our 4 weeks notice the door of our final hope of securing a mortgage firmly closed shut. I don’t mind admitting it was a rough day and we struggled to see how we were going to move forward with things as they were. Later that evening, a good friend of ours called round for a cup of tea. In truth the last thing we wanted was a visitor at that moment, but it was just what we needed. He listened and sympathised with our disappointment (and brought cake!) but he also encouraged us to push the door again of the first house we had seen that was so ideal. We were fairly certain it would have gone by that time as it was a month after we first saw it. But we called anyway and unbelievably it hadn’t even gone on the market yet and we were able to negotiate the price a little more towards our price range and we decided to reach and trust God would provide once again as He has time after time before.
Amazingly within a few hours of agreeing to rent the house an email arrived offering Beccy a few hours of work each month paying the difference between the rent and our budget. Within twelve hours of all the doors seemingly shutting on all possibilities a perfect one opened up and just at the right time the shortfall of our budget was filled.
Perhaps it seems like one giant coincidence or some kind of lucky cosmic timing, but, I am convinced that there is an incredible divinity holding the universe together in the palm of His hands. I am certain He cares about humanity and I believe He works all things for the good of those who love Him. Even when things look impossible or bleak, everything and anything can change in an instant.
Jesus said;
“I tell you not to worry about your life. Don’t worry about having something to eat, drink, or wear. Isn’t life more than food or clothing? Look at the birds in the sky! They don’t plant or harvest. They don’t even store grain in barns. Yet your Father in heaven takes care of them. Aren’t you worth more than birds?
Can worry make you live longer?[e] Why worry about clothes? Look how the wild flowers grow. They don’t work hard to make their clothes. But I tell you that Solomon with all his wealth[f] wasn’t as well clothed as one of them. God gives such beauty to everything that grows in the fields, even though it is here today and thrown into a fire tomorrow. He will surely do even more for you! Why do you have such little faith?
Don’t worry and ask yourselves, “Will we have anything to eat? Will we have anything to drink? Will we have any clothes to wear?” Only people who don’t know God are always worrying about such things. Your Father in heaven knows that you need all of these. But more than anything else, put God’s work first and do what he wants. Then the other things will be yours as well.
Don’t worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself. You have enough to worry about today.”
Matthew 6 v 25-34
(Photo credit to Paul Riley)